spice girl jokes

 

The Incomplete List of Spice Girl Jokes

(adapted quite nicely from the infamous set of "blonde" jokes)

Q. What do you call the Spice Girl with pigtails?
A. A blow job with handle bars.
   
Q. What can strike a Spice Girl without her knowing it?
A. A thought.
   
Q. What did the Spice Girl's right leg say to the left?
A. Nothing. They've never met.

Q. What do you call a Spice Girl with an above average IQ? [from Dinstee]
A. Unmarketable.

Q. How did the Spice Girl break her leg raking leaves? [from Skylark]
A. She fell out of the tree.

Q. How can you tell when a Spice Girl is having a bad day?
A. When her tampon is behind her ear and she doesn't know what she did with her cigarette [from "Jenna P."]

Q. What do you do with a Dead Spice Girl?
A. Bury her with her ass up and use her as a bike park. [from "Swedish Viking"]

Q. How do you keep a Spice Girl from drowning?
A. Shoot her before she hits the water. [from "cag1112"]

Q. What do you call five Spice Girls standing up in a box?
A. Pop Tarts

Q. How can you tell if the Spice Girls have been using the computer?
A. There's Tipp-Ex on the screen

Q. What do you call the host of a Spice Girls interview?
A. An interpreter.

Q. How many Spice Girls does it take to change a lightbulb?
A1. All of them.
A2. None. They'd be too busy trying to talk dirty to it.

Q. What do you call it when the Spice Girls stand ear to ear?
A. A wind tunnel.

Q. What do you call it when the Spice Girls sit in a circle?
A. A dope ring.

Q. What does Mel "Scary" Spice and a beer bottle have in common?
A. They're both empty from the neck up.

Q. How do you drown Victoria "Posh" Spice?
A. Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool.

Q. Why has Emma "Baby" Spice got her hair in pigtails?
A. To cover up the valve stem.

Q. What do you call a fly buzzing inside Mel "Sporty" Spice's head?
A. A Space Invader.

Q. How would Geri "Ginger" Spice commit suicide?
A. She'd dye by her own hand.

Q. Why did the Spice Girl stare at a bottle of orange juice?
A. Because the label said "concentrate".

Q. What does a Spice Girl do after sex? [from Kalee]
A. Opens the car door.

Q. If you are trapped in a lifeboat in the middle of the ocean with the Spice Girls, but there's only enough room for 5 people, who do you throw out? [from Anonymous]
A. Yourself.

Q. Did you hear about the Spice Girl's new book?
A1. They just finished coloring the last page. [from "E"]
A2. They had to take out all the four-letter words and replace them with shorter ones. [Kris King]

Q. What do you call 2 Spice Girls at the bottom of the ocean?
A1. A damned good start! [from Jennifer L. Pitschmann]
A2. Too little too late [Kris King]

Q. What is Mel B's favourite nusery rhyme? [from Mark Jozefowicz]
A. Humpme Dumpme

Q. Why do the Spice Girls wear underwear? [from Sonia Teixeira]
A. To keep their ankles warm

Q. What does "Posh" Spice do when she wakes up? [from Sonia Teixeira]
A. Goes home

Q. What's the difference between Mel B. and a Pit-Bull Terrier? [from Nancy Downing]
A. Lipstick

Q. What's the difference between a Spice girl and cod fish?
A1. Nothing [from Josh C]
A2. A cod fish knows when to stop [from Josh C]
A3. One's got a memory capacity of 8 seconds, and the other's a cod fish [Kris King]
A4. One is a scum sucking bottom dweller and the other is a fish [from "The Vonce"]

Q. What do you call a Spice Girl with two brain cells?
A1. Pregnant [from Steve]
A2. Pregnant with twins [from Geoff Birkbeck]

Q. What happens with a Spice Girl who gets Alzheimer's Disease? [from Steve]
A. Her IQ goes up

Q. Why do the Spice Girls have TGIF on their shoes? [from Steve]
A. "Toes Go In First"

Q. What's the difference between the Spice Girls and a porno movie? [from Bruce]
A. A porno movie's got better music

Q. Why did it take so long for Geri "Ginger" Spice to pass her drivers test? [from Anonymous]
A. Every time the car stopped, she jumped into the backseat

Q. If there was a smart Spice girl, an empty headed Spice girl & Santa Claus on a building ready to jump off into the river, which one would make the biggest splash? [from Lindsey]
A. The empty headed spice girl, because the other 2 don't exist

Q. What is the difference between a Spice song and a broken record? [from "Kinky"]
A. One is irritating, useless and repeats things endlessly, the other is a broken record

Q. How do you keep a Spice busy for a day? [from Katie]
A. Tell her to find a corner in a round room

Q. What's the latest thing the Spice's have celebrated at a bar? [from Katie]
A. Finishing a puzzle in 63 days and it said 4 to 6 years on the box.

Q. What's the difference between the real life Spice Girls and their new plastic dolls? [from Patrick Arnold]
A1. Nothing
A2. The dolls are better looking

Q. Have you heard the Spice Girls singing "1,2,3,4,5" on Channel 5? [from Patrick Arnold]
A. It's so good of them to talk about their I.Q.'s so freely!

Q. What do you say to a Spice Girl in a year's time? [from Hazel]
A. Big Mac and Fries, please.

Q. What's the difference between a spice girl and a shopping trolley? [fromt Hazel Action]
A. A shopping trolley has a mind of its own.

Q. What do you do if a Spice Girl throws a granade at you? [from Steph]
A. Take the pin out and throw it back.

Q. If you and a Spice Girl jumped off a building, who would hit the ground first? [from Steph]
A1. You. The Spice Girl would have to ask for directions.
A2. You. She would float because of all the air in her head

Q. What does a spice girl put behind her ears to be more attractive to the opposite sex? [from Chris Yoest]
A. Her ankles

Q. Why does it take a spice girl so long to use a public toilet? [from Chris Yoest]
A. She gets very confused because she's not used to pulling down her own pants

Q. How do you permanently confuse a Spice Girl? [from Kris (not me!)]
A. Stick them in a circle and tell them to find a corner!

Q. What did the Spice Girl say when she found she was pregnant? [from "The Vonce"]
A. "Are you sure it's mine?!"

Q. Why don't the Spice Girls wear red lipstick? [from Donald Krowchenko]
A. Because red means stop.

Q. How many Spice Girls does it take to change a lightbulb? [from Derek]
A. Who cares as long as I can hold the ladder!

Q. How do you keep a Spice Girl from drowning? [from "IceBear"]
A. Take your foot off her head and let her come up for air.

Q. How do you stop a Spice Girl from jumping up and down on a bed? [from "IceBear"]
A. Put velcro on the ceiling.

Q. How do you babysit a Spice Girl? [from "IceBear"]
A. Wet her lips and stick her on the window.

Q. What do you call a Spice girl's test tube baby? [from "IceBear"]
A. A Janitor-In-A-Drum.

Q. What's this? [hold up hand with 5 fingers spread apart] [from Matthew Prokuda]
A. A spice rack.

Q. What do you call the Spice Girls on a college campus.
A1. Visitors. [from Cara Macleod & Matt Smith]
A2. The cleaning staff. [Kris King]

Q. Did you hear about the Spice Girls first job at the M&M factory? [from Cara Macleod & Matt Smith]
A. They got fired for throwing out all of the W's.

Q. What do you call a Spice Girl at the bottom of a pool? [from Cara Macleod & Matt Smith]
A. An air bubble.

Q. Why does Baby Spice have Square boobs? [from Cara Macleod & Matt Smith]
A. She forgot to take the kleenex out of the box.

Q. Why did the Spice Girls get tattoos? [from Cara Macleod & Matt Smith]
A. So they Could remember their phone numbers

Q. How do you keep the Spice Girls busy? [from ElhGg]
A1. Give them a rubber band and tell them to find the end.
A2. Give them a piece of paper that says turn over on both sides.

Q. What did Geri say when she opened the box of Cheerios? [from Evil Homer]
A. "Look!! Donut Seeds!!"

Q. How do you make a Spice Girl's eyes light up? [from Helen Templer]
A. Shine a flashlight in her ear

Q. How does a Spice Girl spell farm? [from Helen Templer]
A. E-I-E-I-O

Q. Why does it take the Spice Girls so long to make chocolate chip cookies? [from Helen Templer]
A. They have to first peel all the M&M's

Q. How does a Spice Girl brush her teeth? [from Helen Templer]
A. She holds the tooth brush and moves her head up and down

Q. Why did the Spice Girl drive into the ditch? [from Helen Templer]
A. Her blinker was on

Q. How do you get a Baby Spice to laugh on Monday? [from Helen Templer]
A. Tell her a joke on Friday

Q. How do you kill a Spice Girl? [from Bruceki]
A. Pop her with a needle.

Did you hear about the New spice girl names? [from Cara Macleod & Matt Smith]
Skanky Spice, Dyke Spice, Tone Deaf Spice, Chunky Spice, and Silicon Spice!

Have you heard that Louise Woodward is going to take over as Ginger Spice?
She said she's going to drop Baby Spice

The spice girls were driving to Disneyland when they came across a sign that said "Disneyland, left". So they turned around and went home disappointed.